Friday, August 22, 2014

Friend Request

Oh, hello? You want to be my friend? Read on...

I only befriend with real people have real activities. That means I will screen your profile on app - looking for tips, bookmarks and photos. If you are an Elite or I met you in person at Yelp functions (such as UYE), you're automatically in.

However, I don't friend anyone who lives outside of Houston, never visit Houston, areas I never been to or I had no plan of visiting. Because it will crowd my feeds and I can't filter them out.

I only friend with people think like me. I'll unfriend you, if...
You use the app and you possess dukes or duchesses crowns without any check-in feeds.
You attacked a biz without properly expressed interests for improvement.
You wrote dishonest reviews or contradicting reviews.

My rules on strangers:
  • 20% valid reviews - if I clicked on "Link to this review", and it's not pointing to you, it counts one minus. If you have more than 20% invalids, you're denied.
  • Rescue Team - you posted a 5-star review with generic words to save a business after a 1-star review.
  • Writing mill - you have written over 7 reviews per day consecutively. OMG, are you a full time writer? What's the hurry?
  • Indifference - you rated everyone 5 stars, without expressing your excitements in the reviews. 
  • Belittling - you rated every biz 1 star. You hate everyone without good reason. Yelp is not for you.
  • Keyword flags - you used "I'd definitely return" or irrelevant reference to the business. 
  • Ballot Stuffing - I have seen reviews with "please like this place" or with tones of an owner. I'll deny your request, if you are part of a gang writing short and all 5-star reviews after a 1-star review.
  • Ghost Presence - People who only wrote a few reviews but earned crowns by checking in a business just by driving by, without going inside. I will quiz you on your check in.